Day 4
It was brought to my attention that my last post was vague, and in that it may have spawned some imaginations to run where I never intended them to. So…please allow me to clarify a few points.
In being brought up in a Christian and military home, there were many things that I taught were “wrong.” And as a teenager I lived by these rules because I knew that my parents loved me and only wanted the best for me. I understand that some things may seem over-the-top for some of you, but for others these guides are something you may have grown up with as well. I was taught that drinking and smoking harmed the body, so I avoided them. I was taught that using foul language was not a good reflection on myself, the Lord, or my parents. So I refrained from using foul language, although there were MANY times I may have wanted to. I was taught to act like a respectable young lady, and that flirting was not respectable. I was not to ever call a young man, because that showed desperation. A godly young woman did not do things to draw attention to herself in any way.
All that being said, in my last post I mentioned doing things to get a young man’s attention. In my naïveté I thought everyone thought like I did/do, but apparently I didn’t understand that in expressing some thoughts, they might be misconstrued as something much more deviant. I do not want people thinking or believing that I was promiscuous or that I had a secret life where I somehow rebelled against everything I was taught. It was not that at all.
Ok…let’s start again. There was a certain young man that I liked and I wanted his attention. OK, let’s get real here. There were several young men that I liked in high school and tried to get their attention. But this particular fellow had my eye from the get-go. I didn’t know how to behave so I started watching what the other young ladies were doing and how they seemed to be acting. I started flirting with this young man. I went so far as to find out his telephone number and secretly called him at home. Needless to say, when my mother discovered I was calling a young man, I got an earful of scolding! It deterred me - but only for a little while. I just got better at hiding things from my parents. I would call when they were out of the house. I would flirt, shamelessly, while at school. This was NOT who I was raised to act like. I was not the kind of person to rebel against my parents. I was not the kind of person to hide my thoughts and feelings from people. I was not raised to put my desires and intentions “out there” to be trampled on by those who didn’t know how tender my heart truly was.
So, back to yesterday’s post. When I said that views became skewed, I meant that I started acting, to what I knew to be right, shamefully. And I am ashamed. Because those actions when I first started high school continued throughout high school. I got better and better at blurring the lines, and, before long, I was calling the boys that I liked all the time, not caring what my parents thought. I flirted all the time, and that caused me to think things that I knew I shouldn’t - not until I was much older and married! (Yes, I am somewhat of a prude.)
Do you want to know something interesting? All the things that I did to get the attention of guys? Never really worked. In fact one guy actually told me that he never found those actions appealing. Why did he wait until senior year! Oh well. And the original young man whose attention I so desperately wanted? Never got it. Not until graduation day. Then it was too late. And I am biting my tongue even now so that I won’t mention his name because I am so embarrassed. He has likely moved on as has everyone else from 30 years ago! Most of the guys from high school probably haven’t even given me a second thought through the years, and that is just fine with me. Why? Because that girl in high school was young and stupid. I don’t want them to remember that person. I would love for everyone to meet the REAL me. The one who is confident in herself. She is secure in her position in the Lord and won’t compromise her values for someone. She values those traditional values that her parents taught her so many years ago and no longer sees them as moot. She “knows” things. She no longer thinks she “knows it all.”
Hopefully this clears up any confusion anyone might have had.
And, by the way, all these remembrances of high school are interesting. I looked through my senior yearbook and realized that I was so wrapped up in myself and trying to be someone other than myself that I really had very few friends. Sad.
Friday, August 23, 2013
Thursday, August 22, 2013
Day 3
Envy and jealousy are interesting foes. We have all dealt with them at one time or another, haven’t we? Today I want to focus on the object(s) of that envy. This is going to be really tough for me because I am going to be laying my soul open for criticism. But may I ask a favor? Please examine my reasoning before judging me too harshly. We all have our sins and we have to answer to the Lord for those sins. I have accepted forgiveness for these, but at the same time I need to learn from my mistakes. Maybe in the next few minutes you will be able o examine your own life and allow my struggle and lessons help you to heal a bit.
I have had struggles with jealousy for about…..well, for always, I suppose. When I was but a small child I remember wanting to be the center of attention in my class. I was jealous for attention. I wanted to have the best grades and have the teachers “see something special in me.” I was jealous for their favor. I would go to school and can remember having jealous thoughts of the nicer clothes that they wore. My parents struggled most of their lives, as I am sure many parents did back then. Mom would, many times, give up something she wanted or needed in order for me to have the best that money could buy, but to me, as a child, that never seemed to be enough.
I grew to be a teenager, and those feelings of envy followed me all the way to Kentucky! Now I found myself the “new girl” and I am trying to find my “niche” but it is difficult to do when so many people in the school have grown up and lived in the same area and go to school together. But I make an attempt nonetheless. My jealousies flare because I cannot seem to garner the attention of those that I want to become friends with. I am jealous of their friendships. And here is where I begin my dangerous journey. When a teenager attempts to find favor with people, they do things that they either know are wrong or they give up being “themselves” and try to be someone else that they believe will draw attention to themselves. I did both. And the result lasted me until I was well into my early forties.
I remember there was a young man that I really liked and I really wanted him to notice me. I started doing things that I knew to be skewed from what I was taught to believe was correct. But I knew it did get his attention. I loved that. But then again, I knew, deep down it was wrong. I was slowly melding into someone who compromised her values because she was jealous for the attention of someone. This behavior continued throughout my high school years and I found myself having lots of friends, but nobody knew me that well. My jealousy for friends caused me to begin lying to my parents so that I could “measure up” to what my “friends” at school had and did. And because of that I never truly gave 100%. Now, some of you are scratching your heads and wondering what planet I come from, while others know exactly what I am talking about. I applaud those of you who don’t understand. Why? Because you are probably the ones who stayed true to yourselves and made some lifelong friends in the process. You are the ones who never were jealous because you had the very thing I and a few others didn’t have - security.
I graduated and moved on, got married, had children, moved out of the area and started living my life, and realized I was STILL jealous! I had a husband, money, family, and a rich life, but I still felt I didn’t have enough. Why do you suppose that is? I think I now know. I wasn’t being true to myself. I was jealous of those who were content. I had always wanted more. I was jealous of those that had formed life-long friendships. I had no lasting friendships. I was jealous of those who were in Kentucky and liked it. I had moved around so much and thought that was what I wanted. I realized it was not what I, indeed, wanted. I was still jealous of the very same things I was while younger,
So here I am again, looking backwards. I wonder where I went wrong. I wonder what I lacked. I wonder why I could never get what I THOUGHT I wanted. Well, some of you may have already figured this out, but it took me all this time to see it…I was insecure. I gave up being myself way back then and I “lost” my identity - my true identity. I had tried to be someone I wasn’t and gave up some good, life-lasting friendships. (Or at least I believe that to be true now.) I see that my “style” was never going to please everyone, and I find that those who were secure in that area all along are doing just fine! The guys that I tried so desperately to get the attention of, well, they may or may not have liked the real me. And in trying to be someone else I MAY have missed opportunities of getting to know some really great guys.
So, I find myself looking back at my high school years and having regrets. Regrets about being jealous when there was no call to be. I regret not trusting in the God Who created me to be myself, but instead trying to be what I thought was what I needed to be. I regret not allowing so many people in high school a chance to get to know the real me. I am so very sorry that I didn’t give you that chance. I am so sorry for not giving myself a change. Please forgive me and know that I am secure enough in myself now that I can be contented with whatever our futures hold.
Envy and jealousy are interesting foes. We have all dealt with them at one time or another, haven’t we? Today I want to focus on the object(s) of that envy. This is going to be really tough for me because I am going to be laying my soul open for criticism. But may I ask a favor? Please examine my reasoning before judging me too harshly. We all have our sins and we have to answer to the Lord for those sins. I have accepted forgiveness for these, but at the same time I need to learn from my mistakes. Maybe in the next few minutes you will be able o examine your own life and allow my struggle and lessons help you to heal a bit.
I have had struggles with jealousy for about…..well, for always, I suppose. When I was but a small child I remember wanting to be the center of attention in my class. I was jealous for attention. I wanted to have the best grades and have the teachers “see something special in me.” I was jealous for their favor. I would go to school and can remember having jealous thoughts of the nicer clothes that they wore. My parents struggled most of their lives, as I am sure many parents did back then. Mom would, many times, give up something she wanted or needed in order for me to have the best that money could buy, but to me, as a child, that never seemed to be enough.
I grew to be a teenager, and those feelings of envy followed me all the way to Kentucky! Now I found myself the “new girl” and I am trying to find my “niche” but it is difficult to do when so many people in the school have grown up and lived in the same area and go to school together. But I make an attempt nonetheless. My jealousies flare because I cannot seem to garner the attention of those that I want to become friends with. I am jealous of their friendships. And here is where I begin my dangerous journey. When a teenager attempts to find favor with people, they do things that they either know are wrong or they give up being “themselves” and try to be someone else that they believe will draw attention to themselves. I did both. And the result lasted me until I was well into my early forties.
I remember there was a young man that I really liked and I really wanted him to notice me. I started doing things that I knew to be skewed from what I was taught to believe was correct. But I knew it did get his attention. I loved that. But then again, I knew, deep down it was wrong. I was slowly melding into someone who compromised her values because she was jealous for the attention of someone. This behavior continued throughout my high school years and I found myself having lots of friends, but nobody knew me that well. My jealousy for friends caused me to begin lying to my parents so that I could “measure up” to what my “friends” at school had and did. And because of that I never truly gave 100%. Now, some of you are scratching your heads and wondering what planet I come from, while others know exactly what I am talking about. I applaud those of you who don’t understand. Why? Because you are probably the ones who stayed true to yourselves and made some lifelong friends in the process. You are the ones who never were jealous because you had the very thing I and a few others didn’t have - security.
I graduated and moved on, got married, had children, moved out of the area and started living my life, and realized I was STILL jealous! I had a husband, money, family, and a rich life, but I still felt I didn’t have enough. Why do you suppose that is? I think I now know. I wasn’t being true to myself. I was jealous of those who were content. I had always wanted more. I was jealous of those that had formed life-long friendships. I had no lasting friendships. I was jealous of those who were in Kentucky and liked it. I had moved around so much and thought that was what I wanted. I realized it was not what I, indeed, wanted. I was still jealous of the very same things I was while younger,
So here I am again, looking backwards. I wonder where I went wrong. I wonder what I lacked. I wonder why I could never get what I THOUGHT I wanted. Well, some of you may have already figured this out, but it took me all this time to see it…I was insecure. I gave up being myself way back then and I “lost” my identity - my true identity. I had tried to be someone I wasn’t and gave up some good, life-lasting friendships. (Or at least I believe that to be true now.) I see that my “style” was never going to please everyone, and I find that those who were secure in that area all along are doing just fine! The guys that I tried so desperately to get the attention of, well, they may or may not have liked the real me. And in trying to be someone else I MAY have missed opportunities of getting to know some really great guys.
So, I find myself looking back at my high school years and having regrets. Regrets about being jealous when there was no call to be. I regret not trusting in the God Who created me to be myself, but instead trying to be what I thought was what I needed to be. I regret not allowing so many people in high school a chance to get to know the real me. I am so very sorry that I didn’t give you that chance. I am so sorry for not giving myself a change. Please forgive me and know that I am secure enough in myself now that I can be contented with whatever our futures hold.
Tuesday, August 20, 2013
So, I want to re-visit part of what I had mentioned in the last post. The idea of being so young and being expected to know everything and getting to be my age and realizing that we couldn’t possibly know a darn thing.
So, I don’t think I was sheltered much as I was growing up. I had to move around a lot being a kid of an army dad. I remember my freshman year of high school I attended three different schools - a Jr. High school in Texas, a small elementary school in Oklahoma, and a middle school in Kentucky. But I didn’t have a clue what the difference was other than location. How was I supposed to know? Who was supposed to tell me? When I got to Kentucky I was the “new kid.” Everyone knows that being the new kid is torturous! I mean I knew, for heaven’s sake! That was one thing nobody had to tell me. I had been the new kid too many times! But this was going to be my last time, so I did everything I could to settle in. But nobody really took me under their wing to tell me what my future might be the next few years.
I struggled quite a bit those first few months. I won’t go into detail - that will be saved for my diary and it will also save some the embarrassment I am sure it would bring to share for myself and others. But I know, looking back now, that there was no way I was the only one who had those same insecurities, those same issues, those same challenges. (You know who you are.)
Here is a 15-year-old who is supposed to make good friends, but has never had someone show her what friendship looked like (or one who had withstood the test of time). I had no idea what my future held. All I knew was that I needed to make good grades. My relationships consisted of a boy that I liked in elementary school for a few weeks until he upset me and I punched him and he moved on. And as far as extra-curricular activities went, I didn’t have a clue from secretary to yearbook! They were, to me, as foreign as Greenland! (I would have said Germany, but I have been there…lol)
And I will admit, ever so humbly, that I, at the age of twenty-five didn’t have a close friend. I had a husband and a baby to take care of. I didn’t have time for friends. I had to throw any ideas of a “future” out the window. I had to console myself with the fact that I would be a wife and mother all my days, and I would have to give up my dreams of ever becoming a teacher….or marketing executive…or flight attendant….or whatever it was that I had decided to be. I was married but still didn’t know anything about relationships. But to tell the truth I wasn’t mature enough to admit that just yet. And extra-curricular activities of my high school? Well, I am just not sure how any of them truly would have prepared for life.
So, I turned thirty-five, and I am just beginning to touch the surface of who I really am. I understood what it means to have friends, and good ones at that, but I just didn’t have any that would reciprocate the sentiments. I had an idea what my future might be - even though I doubted I would ever see it realized. I mean, who, at this stage of the game decides to go to school and get a degree in entrepreneurship to open up a bed and breakfast. I mean who has the time?!?! And as far as relationships go….well, anyone who has been married for any length of time will tell you that they will NEVER be able to fully understand their spouse! So to say that I was beginning to have serious doubts about this “relationship” thing would be a mild understatement. And by now I was really regretting not spending more time in studies in high school instead of pining over those lost opportunities of participating in a club that was just an excuse to get out of class.
Now, I have come to where I find myself now. I am going to be celebrating a birthday the weekend of my 30th High School reunion and I am feeling rather nostalgic. I have come full circle as far as residency. I believe I fully understand the value of friendship and I am looking forward to a day when I will be able to dote on someone(s) all that care and affection I have come to value. I want to laugh and be silly with my girlfriends and know that they are life-long friends. I “get” and appreciate friendships. My future ….well…..I still don’t know what it holds for me, but praise God I know Who holds my future and I am confident that He has something very special in mind for me. In the area of relationships…I have learned what is important and what is not. I have seen bad and I have seen good. I choose good, so I left a bad relationship of MANY years in lieu of a great one. The main reason is that now, at the age that I am, I am starting to understand “me” better and can find someone who values me.
“So, Petra, what is your point?” you might ask.
Well, I will tell you. How can a person at the age of fifteen POSSIBLY know what she is just now discovering at the age of over-forty-five? And I am fully convinced that if most people were truthful with themselves, they will discover that they, too, might feel the same way. They might look back and see that maybe the choices made/not made in high school were never reflective of who they were going to be thirty years later. So don’t be so hard on yourself. First of all you are not the only one. Secondly, looking back with regret does absolutely nothing but bring you down. Look forward and vow to teach the future generations that they don’t need to be so hard on themselves when they are in high school. Maybe it will only take them twenty years to discover who they really are.
So, I don’t think I was sheltered much as I was growing up. I had to move around a lot being a kid of an army dad. I remember my freshman year of high school I attended three different schools - a Jr. High school in Texas, a small elementary school in Oklahoma, and a middle school in Kentucky. But I didn’t have a clue what the difference was other than location. How was I supposed to know? Who was supposed to tell me? When I got to Kentucky I was the “new kid.” Everyone knows that being the new kid is torturous! I mean I knew, for heaven’s sake! That was one thing nobody had to tell me. I had been the new kid too many times! But this was going to be my last time, so I did everything I could to settle in. But nobody really took me under their wing to tell me what my future might be the next few years.
I struggled quite a bit those first few months. I won’t go into detail - that will be saved for my diary and it will also save some the embarrassment I am sure it would bring to share for myself and others. But I know, looking back now, that there was no way I was the only one who had those same insecurities, those same issues, those same challenges. (You know who you are.)
Here is a 15-year-old who is supposed to make good friends, but has never had someone show her what friendship looked like (or one who had withstood the test of time). I had no idea what my future held. All I knew was that I needed to make good grades. My relationships consisted of a boy that I liked in elementary school for a few weeks until he upset me and I punched him and he moved on. And as far as extra-curricular activities went, I didn’t have a clue from secretary to yearbook! They were, to me, as foreign as Greenland! (I would have said Germany, but I have been there…lol)
And I will admit, ever so humbly, that I, at the age of twenty-five didn’t have a close friend. I had a husband and a baby to take care of. I didn’t have time for friends. I had to throw any ideas of a “future” out the window. I had to console myself with the fact that I would be a wife and mother all my days, and I would have to give up my dreams of ever becoming a teacher….or marketing executive…or flight attendant….or whatever it was that I had decided to be. I was married but still didn’t know anything about relationships. But to tell the truth I wasn’t mature enough to admit that just yet. And extra-curricular activities of my high school? Well, I am just not sure how any of them truly would have prepared for life.
So, I turned thirty-five, and I am just beginning to touch the surface of who I really am. I understood what it means to have friends, and good ones at that, but I just didn’t have any that would reciprocate the sentiments. I had an idea what my future might be - even though I doubted I would ever see it realized. I mean, who, at this stage of the game decides to go to school and get a degree in entrepreneurship to open up a bed and breakfast. I mean who has the time?!?! And as far as relationships go….well, anyone who has been married for any length of time will tell you that they will NEVER be able to fully understand their spouse! So to say that I was beginning to have serious doubts about this “relationship” thing would be a mild understatement. And by now I was really regretting not spending more time in studies in high school instead of pining over those lost opportunities of participating in a club that was just an excuse to get out of class.
Now, I have come to where I find myself now. I am going to be celebrating a birthday the weekend of my 30th High School reunion and I am feeling rather nostalgic. I have come full circle as far as residency. I believe I fully understand the value of friendship and I am looking forward to a day when I will be able to dote on someone(s) all that care and affection I have come to value. I want to laugh and be silly with my girlfriends and know that they are life-long friends. I “get” and appreciate friendships. My future ….well…..I still don’t know what it holds for me, but praise God I know Who holds my future and I am confident that He has something very special in mind for me. In the area of relationships…I have learned what is important and what is not. I have seen bad and I have seen good. I choose good, so I left a bad relationship of MANY years in lieu of a great one. The main reason is that now, at the age that I am, I am starting to understand “me” better and can find someone who values me.
“So, Petra, what is your point?” you might ask.
Well, I will tell you. How can a person at the age of fifteen POSSIBLY know what she is just now discovering at the age of over-forty-five? And I am fully convinced that if most people were truthful with themselves, they will discover that they, too, might feel the same way. They might look back and see that maybe the choices made/not made in high school were never reflective of who they were going to be thirty years later. So don’t be so hard on yourself. First of all you are not the only one. Secondly, looking back with regret does absolutely nothing but bring you down. Look forward and vow to teach the future generations that they don’t need to be so hard on themselves when they are in high school. Maybe it will only take them twenty years to discover who they really are.
Does anybody else struggle with memories? I’m not talking about whether or not you are getting old and can’t remember. I’m talking about real versus tainted memories. The difference between what actually happened and what you remember to have happened. Do you find the older you get the more you view the past through rose-colored glasses?
I know I am getting older. My mirror tells me. My driver’s license tells me. The frequency in which I am to report to my doctor tells me. And now there is one more reminder…my upcoming 30-year reunion notifications on Facebook. I can’t possibly be this old, can I? I don’t FEEL old. I don’t ACT old (or so I have been told). By some people’s standards I don’t even LOOK old. But, the birth certificate never lies. And so now, let me bring this back around to my original question. Does anyone struggle with memories? Or am I the only one?
Earlier today I reconnected with a high school girlfriend whom I haven’t seen in over thirty years. We began talking as if the last thirty years was but a couple months. It was exhilarating, to say the least. To chat with someone and within a few short minutes be caught up on the details that bog us down on a day-to-day basis. So, as anyone would naturally do, I got out my yearbooks and starting finding pictures and mementos of my high school stint. Who else could I get caught up with? I must admit I got a little excited about the prospect because I have such fond memories of high school.
Would you like to know what I discovered? I’m a whole lot older than I believed myself to be. I must be! Because there is no way I can have such fond memories and have very little, if any, connection (outside of a few Facebook posts) with anyone in my graduating class! So what is the deal? And the interesting thing is that I could probably run into any number of them and either a.) not remember their name/recognize them; b.) start talking to them like we were in high school all over again; or c.) wonder what happened to us that we never connected through all the years. Or maybe a combination of a few.
But it really doesn’t matter because my memory is tainted! Don’t you see? I remember a very different scenario that what was actually true. I remember all of the good stuff. I remember the senior trip we took to King‘s Island….oh, wait…I didn’t go. Oops. Well, I remember prom, the dress I wore and shopped for hours for, the dancing, the music…..oh, wait….that never happened either for me. Well, I do remember the close friends I made. They even wrote in my yearbook that we would keep in touch after graduation. Those friends were the best! Oh….wait….that didn’t happen either. I remember all the fun I had in the classes joking around with everyone, telling jokes and laughing. That happened, right? Well, yes, but I was always on the “wrong” side of the room. I clearly recall senior skip day…but I was too prudish to actually skip. I was too ignorant of what “fun” was to enjoy a lot of the activities my senior year. I didn’t know a THING about friendships, my future, relationships, “workings” of school extra-curricular activities, and, most of all, myself. I mean, seriously, who really know, at the age of seventeen and eighteen about ANY of those things?
So here I sit at the age of….ahem….40-ish…..and wonder…”Am I the only one that doesn’t remember high school through rose-colored glasses?” I mean seriously….I know that there are some of you who have kept in contact with certain people all through the years. I know that some of you married your high school sweethearts and it has lasted all this time. I’m certain that many of you have never moved from the area from which you graduated and therefore it has been inevitable that you run across people all the time that you knew in high school. Some of you have even decided to stay in the school system and teach in the very school you went to. And I know that still others have children who are now attending that school and are participating in the same activities that you did.
But I can’t help but think that the majority of us have moved on to our separate paths, growing old, enjoying life for the most part, and looking at high school and senior year through our tainted old-people glasses that only allow us to remember the good. Because isn’t that what we are supposed to do?
This is going to be the first in a series of posts that I will publish that have to do with the time leading up to my reunion, which, sadly, I will not be able to attend.
I know I am getting older. My mirror tells me. My driver’s license tells me. The frequency in which I am to report to my doctor tells me. And now there is one more reminder…my upcoming 30-year reunion notifications on Facebook. I can’t possibly be this old, can I? I don’t FEEL old. I don’t ACT old (or so I have been told). By some people’s standards I don’t even LOOK old. But, the birth certificate never lies. And so now, let me bring this back around to my original question. Does anyone struggle with memories? Or am I the only one?
Earlier today I reconnected with a high school girlfriend whom I haven’t seen in over thirty years. We began talking as if the last thirty years was but a couple months. It was exhilarating, to say the least. To chat with someone and within a few short minutes be caught up on the details that bog us down on a day-to-day basis. So, as anyone would naturally do, I got out my yearbooks and starting finding pictures and mementos of my high school stint. Who else could I get caught up with? I must admit I got a little excited about the prospect because I have such fond memories of high school.
Would you like to know what I discovered? I’m a whole lot older than I believed myself to be. I must be! Because there is no way I can have such fond memories and have very little, if any, connection (outside of a few Facebook posts) with anyone in my graduating class! So what is the deal? And the interesting thing is that I could probably run into any number of them and either a.) not remember their name/recognize them; b.) start talking to them like we were in high school all over again; or c.) wonder what happened to us that we never connected through all the years. Or maybe a combination of a few.
But it really doesn’t matter because my memory is tainted! Don’t you see? I remember a very different scenario that what was actually true. I remember all of the good stuff. I remember the senior trip we took to King‘s Island….oh, wait…I didn’t go. Oops. Well, I remember prom, the dress I wore and shopped for hours for, the dancing, the music…..oh, wait….that never happened either for me. Well, I do remember the close friends I made. They even wrote in my yearbook that we would keep in touch after graduation. Those friends were the best! Oh….wait….that didn’t happen either. I remember all the fun I had in the classes joking around with everyone, telling jokes and laughing. That happened, right? Well, yes, but I was always on the “wrong” side of the room. I clearly recall senior skip day…but I was too prudish to actually skip. I was too ignorant of what “fun” was to enjoy a lot of the activities my senior year. I didn’t know a THING about friendships, my future, relationships, “workings” of school extra-curricular activities, and, most of all, myself. I mean, seriously, who really know, at the age of seventeen and eighteen about ANY of those things?
So here I sit at the age of….ahem….40-ish…..and wonder…”Am I the only one that doesn’t remember high school through rose-colored glasses?” I mean seriously….I know that there are some of you who have kept in contact with certain people all through the years. I know that some of you married your high school sweethearts and it has lasted all this time. I’m certain that many of you have never moved from the area from which you graduated and therefore it has been inevitable that you run across people all the time that you knew in high school. Some of you have even decided to stay in the school system and teach in the very school you went to. And I know that still others have children who are now attending that school and are participating in the same activities that you did.
But I can’t help but think that the majority of us have moved on to our separate paths, growing old, enjoying life for the most part, and looking at high school and senior year through our tainted old-people glasses that only allow us to remember the good. Because isn’t that what we are supposed to do?
This is going to be the first in a series of posts that I will publish that have to do with the time leading up to my reunion, which, sadly, I will not be able to attend.
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