Self - consciousness.  What do I believe about myself?  I cannot remember a single day of my life going by when I do not think about one of the following questions: "Are my eyes too puffy?" "How much weight have I gained?"  "Where did that grey hair come from?"  "Will anyone really care if I shave my legs?"   "Will my cellulite show if I wear this skirt?" 

I, like most women in the United States, listen to everything the world tells me.  I guess if I really think about that statement, I would see that this is an aweful way to live life!  That is a lot of unnessary stress to take on.  Who can actually live up to the standards "the world" demands?  Not even the most famous of people can live life like that!  They have people surrounding them constantly so they will look "perfect" for a select few people.  Who are they trying to impress?

More importantly, who am I trying to impress?  Am I trying to impress or just get by without criticism?  Or maybe both?  Am I really looking at the most important things in life?  Does my grey hair really matter in the scheme of this life that I am living?  Do my puffy eyes reveal more than just the fact that I didn't get enough sleep?  Do my unshaved legs reflect anything other than I was too lazy to get the razor out that day? 

What would happen if I woke up one day and did NOT concern myself with any of those niggling questions I normally ask?

Instead of looking at the puffy eyes, I would don a pair of wonderful "Jackie-O" sunglasses and look fashionably stylish - almost like Sarah Jessica Parker!  Instead of thinking about the weight I may have gained because I spent a week eating WAY TOO MUCH PASTA, dreaming of and preparing for my trip to Italy, I will spend a day shopping for "new" clothes at the Goodwill store before I fly to arguably the most beautiful country in the world (at least for me).  Instead of worrying about how that grey hair is such a stark contrast to my dark crop of hair, I will add a beautiful floppy hat, which will make a glorious addition to those glasses!  Instead of thinking about my laze-faire attitude during my grooming time (foregoing the shaving of the legs), I will put on one of those maxi skirts I will have purchased and it will just cover them!  And as far as that cellulite is concerned?  Well that will be with me forever, so I will just find a man who can appreciate it along with all of the other curves that come along with it.

Sound like a plan?

So come on, life!  Bring it on!  I know that I can have fun with you no matter what you throw at me. I choose to make lemonade from the what the world may call "lemons."  I will accept the way I am and choose to listen to the ones who will do the same.  For those who nay-say the "me" I have become...."sorry".  You have no influence in my life anymore!